We have been experiencing more and more problems with The Littlest Apple ignoring what we say, having tantrums, and just generally being his strong-willed little two year old self.  I’ve read many a parenting book (and I plan to go back and blog reviews of some about strong-willed children at some point).  Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours, by Dr. Kevin Leman is my latest read, and I found some really great advice in this one.

This book by Kevin Leman is written from a Christian perspective (primarily based on Ephesians 6:1-4), and teaches what Leman refers to as “reality discipline,” which consists of a healthy balance of discipline and respect.  The idea is not to be too permissive and not to be too authoritarian.  (Much easier said than done!)  While aimed at parents of kids of all ages and not just parents of toddlers, I still found plenty of great advice to use with my 2 year old.

Here are the 7 Principles of Reality Discipline that are discussed in detail in this book:

1. Establish a healthy authority over your children. A family is not a democracy.  Parents need to be parents.  Authority needs to be a display of love over power.
2. Hold your children accountable for their actions. Don’t make excuses for your children.  They need to learn about the negative and positive consequences of their actions.
3. Let reality be the teacher. Don’t be afraid to let your kids fail.  Look for teachable moments in the everyday.
4. Use action more than words. Make your expectations clear, but don’t keep repeating yourself.
5. Stick to your guns, but don’t shoot yourself in the foot. Make a decision and stick to it.  You have to be strong and outlast the marathon whining sessions.
6. Relationships come before rules.  Learn who your children really are…what makes them tick.  Teach your children to love others, to put others first, to be givers not takers.
7. Live by your values. Your children learn from watching you.

One of the main techniques that I took away from this book is all about how to use actions instead of words.  This particular technique Leman refers to as “pulling the rug out and let the little buzzards tumble.”  That sounds SO harsh, doesn’t it?  But this really just means to stop throwing empty threats at your children and to actually DO something instead of just listening to lots of whining or tantrums.  The example provided is that when a child complains about dinner (ahem, all you picky eaters!!), you simply dump their food down the garbage disposal.  The idea is that eventually, the child will learn that you aren’t going to mess around.  That’s pretty extreme in my opinion, and I’m not quite on board with the extremes he goes to, but this technique has its merits. At my house, we aren’t going to apply this idea to food as long as The Littlest Apple’s other food issues continue.  BUT I certainly started apply this “pulling the rug out” idea to other things.  When The Littlest Apple does something I don’t like, doesn’t listen, or has a tantrum, I only give him one quick warning before I put him in timeout.  Sometimes no warning at all, depending on the severity of his action (and ok, sometimes my mood too).  No more warning after warning after warning.  That was getting really old, and we weren’t getting anywhere.  Now that I’ve started this new method, The Littlest Apple is starting to listen to directions and warnings a little better.  We’ve still got quite a ways to go though.

There is also a great deal to learn from this book on how to earn your child’s respect.  As Leman points out, you can attempt to discipline your child all day long, but earning their respect is a whole different ballgame, and definitely makes the discipline attempts work a little better.

One caveat:  Leman is in favor of spanking, used sparingly.  I personally am not in favor of spanking ever, so I disagreed with those portions of this book.  That being said, there is still lots to learn here!

Disclaimer: I was not paid to review this book.  It was just a good read that I wanted to share with you! However, the links above are Amazon Affiliate links.

Although I am still recovering at home from my unexpected 4 night stay at the hospital, we FINALLY got some Christmas decorations up yesterday, just in time for The Nester’s Christmas Tour of Homes!  I am definitely paying for it today, having moved around a little more than I should have when I’m supposed to be taking it easy and not lifting anything over 5 pounds.  We definitely scaled things back this year, skipping the outside lights and wreaths entirely.  I still have a few things left to add: garland above the kitchen cabinets, garland on the banister, two small lighted trees in urns for our front porch.  But now I finally feel like Christmas is here, and I love having my house decorated for the holidays!  This was definitely a much needed pick-me-up that has lifted my spirits.  I’m still learning how to use The Picky Apple’s fancy-pants camera, so some of these pictures have a little too much flash.

Here are a few little glimpses of Christmas at our house…

Our front door wreath:

I just love the sound of bells jingling every time the door opens.  The Littlest Apple loves to play with these too, as he sings “Jingle Bells.”

Last year I bought a whole bunch of discounted ornaments to use in various apothecary jars and hurricane lamps/vases around the house.  Such a simple way to decorate, and I love how festive it looks!

Big Santa Nutcracker and an apothecary jar full of silver bells:

Christmas potpourri with some ornaments and silver bells thrown in for some extra sparkle!

Polka dot boxes purchased at HomeGoods last year.  Wishing I had purchased a third one….

I decorate the mantle a little differently every year.  This year I’ve got a garland (with red apples, of course), nutcrackers, and Christmas blocks.  I’d like to change out my candles or add some ribbon to them.  I’ve also been looking for some mercury glass stands similar in size to the clear glass ones I own.  Sorry this photo is a little blurry….

Another view…why hello, dusty mirror!

The Littlest Apple is still young enough to want to pull the stockings down from the mantle (and he can actually reach them this year), so for now, the stockings are hung from the top of the nearby bookcase.  I’m looking forward to having them back on the mantle again.  Maybe next year?

My favorite Santa snowglobe that plays “We Wish You a Merry Christmas”:

And last but not least, the star of the show…our Christmas tree!  The Picky Apple had to go get the tree all by himself yesterday, and it took him 2 hours!  I was a little annoyed that he was gone so long, but the tree he picked is just perfect!

When The Picky Apple and I first got married, I decided I wanted to have a Santa themed tree with only Santa ornaments.  We’ve been slowly adding to our collection over the years.  Last year, I decided the tree needed a little something extra, so I bought lots of silver and red sparkly ornaments to go along with all of the Santas.  As a result, my old tree topper and ribbons for the tree (cream and GOLD) no longer match, and the tree definitely needs more decorations.  This year after Christmas, I’ll be hunting for a new tree topper, ribbon, and some tulle to add to the tree next year.  And more lights!!

Even though The Littlest Apple is trying to grab at all the ornaments and lights, we still decorated the tree all the way down.  (Last year I only decorated the top half.)  Most of the ornaments near the bottom are not breakable, but we’re trying hard to teach him to look with his eyes and not with his hands!

Closeups of some of the ornaments…

Hope you enjoyed the tour of our Christmas decorations!

I tried this new recipe early last week, and it was a surprising hit with The Picky Apple.  I wasn’t entirely sure how well a dish without meat as a main component would go over with him, but in an effort to reduce our grocery bill, I was attempting to cook less meat.  Note that this dish is not meatless…the bacon adds some important flavor to these rice fritters.  I will note that the spinach component of the recipe was a big flop, but that may have just been my fault…the spinach wound up extra greasy and full of breadcrumbs.  The cheesy rice fritters were great though!  Crispy on the outside and cheesy in the middle!

Cheesy Rice Fritters

from Every Day with Rachael Ray

Ingredients:

• 1 cup arborio rice
• 3 slices bacon, chopped
• 1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese
• 1 cup grated parmesan cheese
• 1 large egg, lightly beaten
• Salt and pepper
• 1/2 cup seasoned breadcrumbs
• 1/4 cup extra-virgin olive oil
• One 10 ounce bag spinach, coarsely chopped
• 1 pinch crushed red pepper

Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.  In a medium saucepan, bring the rice and 2 1/2 cups water to a boil.  Lower the heat and simmer until the rice is still firm but cooked through and the water has evaporated, about 20 minutes.  Transfer to a large bowl and let cool slightly.

Meanwhile, in a large skillet, cook the bacon until crisp.  Using a slotted spoon, add the bacon to the rice, reserving the skillet with the bacon fat.  Stir the mozzarella, parmesan and egg into the rice mixture; season with salt and pepper.

Divide the rice mixture into 12 mounds on the prepared baking sheet.  Flatten into 3-inch patties.  Sprinkle on both sides with the breadcrumbs.

Add the olive oil to the skillet and heat over medium-high heat.  Working in batches, add the patties and cook, turning once, until crisp, about 5 minutes.  Drain on paper towels.  Add the spinach to the skillet and cook over high heat, turning until wilted, about 2 minutes; season with the crushed red pepper.  Top with the fritters.

Freezer Tip: If you are not going to eat the fritters immediately, place the cooked fritters on a baking sheet and freeze until solid, then wrap in plastic wrap.  Bake the frozen fritters in a 375 degree F oven for 10 minutes.

I was already feeling behind on my Christmas to do list, and now it’s just physically impossible for me to get it all done.  Over the last couple of days, I’ve been thinking hard about what is important and non-negotiable for me, and what is extra and fun (or not fun, as the case may be).  I really haven’t done much at all yet.  In fact, I still have my fall decorations up!!  Here’s my to do list and what I’m doing about it:

• 25 Days of Christmas Books (underway!)
• Select a Christmas tree (The Picky Apple may be doing this without me tomorrow)
• Decorate inside of the house and Christmas tree (Put up fall decorations first!!  Hoping to start this tomorrow.)
• Decorate outside of house and put up lights (this is The Picky Apple’s job, and usually requires help from his dad or a friend)
• Buy family Christmas presents (I’ve got The Littlest Apple’s done.  Still need to shop for everyone else.  Thank goodness one side of the family decided to draw names for the adults this year, and thank goodness for online shopping since I can’t drive for the next 2 weeks!  I need to take care of this quickly!)
• Wrap presents (The Picky Apple is a much better wrapper than me, so he may get to do all of the gifts but his)
• 15 Cookie Boxes for friends and family (Not happening for 2009.  I know our friends love the cookie boxes, but I also know that they love me for me and not for my cookies and will understand….hopefully.  I already purchased the boxes, so I’ll be all set for next year!)
• Take photos for Christmas cards and order Christmas cards. (As much as I love Christmas cards, this was another easy thing for me to cut this year)
• Take The Littlest Apple to see Santa (maybe next weekend)
• Christmas crafts with The Littlest Apple (coming soon, assuming TLA isn’t still on a craft strike!)
• Drive to look at Christmas lights with The Littlest Apple (we’ll probably do this next weekend)
• The Littlest Apple’s class Christmas party next Thursday.  (I’m in charge of the snacks, which include fruit and homemade cookies which the kids will be decorating.  Still going to get this done somehow.  As room mom, I’m planning to be there.)
• Christmas Day Cooking and Baking (Cinnamon Rolls, Roasted Turkey, other baked goods.  Still planning to bake the cinnamon rolls at the very least!)
• I was planning on taking The Littlest Apple with my parents on a trip to visit extended family on the 26th.  This is up in the air at the moment.
• Host New Year’s Brunch for family and friends. I had to cancel last year because of a sinus infection, and I don’t think I’m going to do it this year either.  Sigh.  Maybe next year.

So, I’m feeling a little better now that I’ve cut down my list.  I know it doesn’t look like I cut much, but it seems a little more do-able now.  Time to get busy!

Thanks so much to all of you for your amazing comments on my last post.  I’m home from the hospital now and feeling as good as can be expected as long as I take my pain meds every 4 hours on the hour (and even then, they tend to wear off after about 3 hours).  Mentally, I’m doing really well.  Physically, I’ve still got a ways to go.  It felt so good to sleep in my own bed last night!  The Picky Apple will be home with me for the next few days, and the grandparents are helping out too.  The Littlest Apple is still not feeling good either: he’s got an ear infection.

I thought today would be a great day for some Apple Picks.  I’m hoping to get a few new recipes, book reviews, and other things posted in the next few days since I’m just going to be sitting around!

I love body scrubs and they always feel amazing on my super dry skin.  Here’s a recipe for a Sweet & Spicy Brown Sugar Scrub that I’m looking forward to trying.

Remember our discussion about pants for skinny kids, and the miracle of adjustable waist pants?  Julie K has a tutorial on how to add adjustable elastic to kids’ pants in 5 easy steps.

It’s not looking like I’m going to be doing much cookie baking this Christmas, but you’ll be sure to find a recipe to try from this list of 50 Cookie Recipes from Southern Living.  I printed nearly half of these to try!

Still need some gift ideas for younger kids?  I thought Parenting’s Toys of the Year list had some great selections this year.  I particularly love the Citiblocs.

I’m hoping to perfect my cookie decorating skills before next Christmas using this guide on How to Decorate with Royal Icing from Annie’s Eats.

‘Tis the season for homemade gifts!  Our Best Bites has a great list of gifts from the kitchen, guaranteed to delight friends, neighbors and teachers!

Two major things happened on Friday.  First of all, it SNOWED in Houston, something that has happened only 34 times ever in this city.

As for the other part, I hadn’t really decided yet how much to share on the blog, but here goes….all the drama, in what will likely be the longest post ever.

Friday, I had to get up bright and early to get an ultrasound because I was seven weeks pregnant, spotting and cramping.  Having had two prior miscarriages (one in December 2006 shortly before The Littlest Apple was conceived and another miscarriage in August of this year at 12 weeks, with resulting D & C), I  was about 99% sure I was experiencing a third miscarriage.  The Picky Apple and I were being cautiously optimistic this time around, had not told anyone yet, and weren’t too surprised when I started spotting.  Sure enough, my OB  confirmed a miscarriage with an ultrasound, and I was sent home to rest and recover.  She told me that since I had passed a little tissue already, I should expect a little more cramping but nothing major.

As Friday went on, I was cramping so much that I couldn’t walk.  Every time I stood up, I got dizzy.  Every time I stood up, my hearing went away and was replaced by buzzing, and my vision got all spotty.  Each time this happened, I immediately laid down on the bathroom floor (which was usually where I was).  None of my OTC painkillers were helping.  None of my prescription painkillers (left from August D & C) were helping.  But I still just thought “man, this is way worse than the other miscarriages I experienced.”

Around 6:30 pm on Friday, I finally decided that I needed to call my doctor and/or get myself to the emergency room because of the intensity of the pain.  My OB (and the other doctors in the practice) work at a hospital in the Med Center, a good 45 minutes from our home.  My husband spoke with the doctor on call, Dr. I, and was advised to get there ASAP, and if we couldn’t make it all the way in (keeping in mind the roads were icy and maybe closed) that we should go to the closest ER possible.  Dr. I (who also happens to be the doctor who performed my emergency c-section 2 years ago), was concerned about an ectopic pregnancy.  Ectopic pregnancy is one that implants itself in the fallopian tubes or ovaries, causing intense pain.  It must be removed, and if not treated early enough, it can rupture.

The Picky Apple summoned his parents to watch TLA, and he also called my parents to let them know what was happenning.  Up until this point, none of our parents even knew I was pregnant, so I think they were in a bit of a shock.  When my in-laws arrived, I was crawling backwards down the stairs, having to rest every couple of stairs so I didn’t pass out.  I was in SO MUCH PAIN.

We finally got in the car, and I decided we should just get down to the Med Center, so that I could be treated by doctors who at least knew my medical history.  But I was really hoping that Dr. I (the one who performed my c-section) would still be there.  Longest drive ever.  Every bump and turn was excruciating, and I felt sick the whole time.

Luckily the ER was deserted, because I was barely conscious.  My hearing was completely muffled, and I was in a tremendous amount of pain.

As soon as they took my vitals, it became clear that something was very very wrong.  My blood pressure was a very low 60/30.  I was begging for pain medication, but they couldn’t give it to me until my blood pressure went up some.

After the initial 60/30 reading, they wheeled me into a room and there were immediately about 10 people around.  I got oxygen, IV fluids, and a woman came to give an ultrasound.  By this point, Dr. I had also been paged from upstairs.

Longest ultrasound ever, laying there in pain, with the poking and prodding.  And still no pain meds.

Soon it became clear that I did have an ectopic pregnancy, and that it had ruptured.  The pain in my abdomen was from all of the blood from the rupture.  By this time, I was also starting to have trouble breathing, because the blood and fluids pushing on my diaphragm.  Later, I found out that they had to drain over a liter of blood from my abdomen!

The initial plan was to go in laproscopically, but because of an umbilical hernia surgery I had as a child, that wasn’t an option.  Dr. I decided to go in through my c-section scar.

Still no pain meds…it seemed that the only way I was getting relief was from anesthesia….I have never been so happy to see an anesthesiologist in my entire life!

The surgery went as well as could be expected.  The ectopic pregnancy was actually right where the left fallopian tube joins up with uterus.  Dr. I had to cut out a chunk of my uterus, and my ovary is no longer connected, but it is in-tact.  I received 2 bags of blood during the surgery.

So.  Here I sit in the hospital on Sunday night.  I spent all of yesterday on morphine.  Today I’m on some oral pain meds that don’t make me feel as sick.  I also received another 2 bags of blood transfusions today.

My catheter has been removed, and I am supposed to start walking around some tomorrow.  I’m not sure if I’ll be going home on Monday or Tuesday.

It’s basically like I had another c-section (though without the resulting baby), so this could make the next few pre-Christmas weeks relatively interesting.

Once again, I am SO THANKFUL to have my parents and in-laws nearby.  The in-laws have been taking care of The Littlest Apple (who incidentally came down with a fever and vomiting the same night we left for the ER….not sure how that’s going to affect my going home).  My parents have been here at the hospital with me during the daytime, and brought food to my in-laws last night.

And of course, The Picky Apple has been wonderful too.  He has been sleeping on a couch-bed in my hospital room that is covered with plastic.  The first night I was really out of it, but the thermostat in our room was on 55, and he very nearly froze.  Poor guy!

Anyway.  That’s why you haven’t heard much from me lately!  All of my Christmas-y posts are on hold for the near future!  My apologies for the rambling nature of this post and any grammatical or spelling errors.  I’m hoping to get back in to the swing of things soon!

I’m posting lots of recipes this week.  Hopefully I’ll have something different to talk about in the next few days, but for now it feels like all I’ve been doing is cooking and baking lately, and I have a couple recipes that I just had to share!  I’ve had these pumpkin rolls on my Menu Plan for oh, about a month, and I’ve been thinking about them since I first saw the recipe in the October issue of Family Circle.

I FINALLY got around to making them last night and they turned out great despite 3 errors on my part.  These are some VERY forgiving pumpkin buns!  Things I did wrong:

1) Used pumpkin pie filling instead of pumpkin puree.  (I grabbed the wrong can at the store)

2) Only rolled out the dough into ONE rectangle, instead of 2.  This recipe makes 2 pans of buns, but I rolled out the dough, filled, and rolled them up before I looked back at the recipe to see that I should have done that twice.  This turned out okay though, because I liked how bready and big they were!  (If you do this, just make sure you split them into several pans so they have room to spread out).

3) Didn’t grease the pan.  Lots of crunchy cinnamon-y goodness got stuck to the bottom of the pan instead of the bottom of the rolls.

The pumpkin flavor in these isn’t very strong, but they are delicious!

Pumpkin Buns

from Family Circle, October 2009

Ingredients:

• 1 envelope (1/4 ounce) active dry yeast
• 1/4 cup warm water (100 to 110 degrees F)
• 1 teaspoon plus 2 tablespoons granulated sugar
• 2 eggs
• 1/4 cup (1/2 stick) unsalted butter, melted
• 1 can (15 ounces) solid-pack pumpkin
• 5 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
• 3/4 teaspoon salt

Filling:

• 1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, softened
• 1/4 cup granulated sugar
• 1 cup packed light-brown sugar
• 1 tablespoon cinnamon

Glaze:

• 2 cups confectioners’ sugar
• 3 tablespoons milk

Sprinkle yeast over warm water in large bowl.  Add 1 teaspoon of the granulated sugar; let stand until foamy, about 5 minutes.  Beat in remaining 2 tablespoons sugar, the eggs, butter and pumpkin.

Gradually add 5 cups of the flour and the salt, scraping side of the bowl, until soft dough forms.  Turn out onto floured surface and knead remaining 1/2 cup flour into dough, adding more if sticky.  Knead for 10 minutes, until smooth.  Dough will be soft.

Grease a bowl; add dough.  Cover with plastic wrap and place in a warm spot until doubled, about 1 1/4 hours.

Coat two 13 x 9 x 2 inch baking pans with nonstick cooking spray.  Make Filling: Mix butter, granulated and brown sugars, and cinnamon in a bowl.

Punch down dough.  Roll out half onto lightly floured surface to form a 16 x 10-inch rectangle.  Spread with half of the filling.  Starting on one long side, roll up jelly-roll fashion.  Pinch seam to close.  Repeat with second half of dough and filling.

Cut each log crosswise into 12 generous 1-inch pieces.  Arrange 12 pieces, cut-side down, in each prepared pan.  Cover with plastic wrap; let sit in a warm spot until buns double in size, about 30 to 45 minutes.  (You can refrigerate one pan overnight or cover plastic with foil and freeze at this point.  Thaw in fridge overnight, then thaw on counter while preheating oven.)

Heat oven to 350 degrees F.  Uncover pans and bake buns until they are golden brown and bubbly, 28 to 33 minutes (thawed buns, 36 minutes).  Transfer to a wire rack; let cool 10 minutes.

Glaze: Blend confectioners’ sugar and milk.  Drizzle over buns (about 1/3 cup per pan).  Serve warm.

‘Tis the season for holiday parties!  In addition to friendship and fun, holiday parties mean lots and lots of food. Particularly finger food and appetizers.  Here are a few of my favorite appetizers that will keep your guests coming back for more.  I’m hoping to try some new appetizers this holiday season!

Dipping Oil: Goes great with crusty bread…just like the dipping oil at Carrabba’s

Buffalo Chicken Nuggets: Works great as a meal too!

Chicken Empanadas: These freeze well and work great for dinner too!

Warm Goat Cheese Toasts with Rosemary, Pecans and Honey:  This is my MOST FAVORITE appetizer of all time!  Sometimes I make these just for me, for a snack.  Love it!

Steak Bites: A recent discovery that makes a great meaty appetizer or dinner.  Bite size steaks!

I’m sharing this post with the 2nd Annual Bloggy Progressive Dinner: Appetizers, hosted by Balancing Beauty and Bedlam.

I have lots of friends who have recently made the transition from 1 child to 2 (or more) children.  Sorta Crunchy’s advice for moms making the transition to having several children at home is great and there is lots of great advice in the comment section too!

I’m definitely going to be using some of these snowman printables from Confessions of a Homeschooler with The Littlest Apple sometime soon.  What a fun resource!

I’ve been wanting to make homemade vanilla extract for a couple of years now.  This guide from Passionate Homemaking makes it sound so easy!

These Butter Fudge Fingers from Your Homebased Mom sound delicious!  Maybe a contender for my Christmas Cookie Boxes this year?

I think my Tall and Creamy Cheesecake from last week is in for some stiff competition….in the form of this Cappuccino Fudge Cheesecake from Smitten Kitchen.  Looks amazing!

The best way to teach your children kindness is to model that behavior yourself.  Simple Mom has a great post about cultivating a life of kindness with your kids.

I’m trying lots of new recipes this week, using leftover turkey and other meat from the freezer.  I’m also incorporating a meatless meal this week…we’ll see how that one goes over with The Picky Apple.  We’re trying to bring down our grocery bill and actually stick to a grocery budget for a change.  (What a concept!)  I always hesitate to discuss numbers for grocery bills because I know everyone has a different idea about how much they should be spending, and I know many could feed a family of 4 or even 6 on what our “goal” is.  Our goal  (okay, okay, it is $150 a week) is a great starting point that seems absolutely doable for 2 adults and a 2 year old who doesn’t eat much!  This would be a definite improvement over what we’ve been spending.

Monday: leftovers

Tuesday: Cheesy Rice Fritters with Spinach (new recipe)

Wednesday: Southwestern Turkey Soup (new recipe), Cornbread

Thursday: Coconut Chicken (new recipe), Basmati Rice, Acorn Squash

Friday: Chili Rice (new recipe), homemade tortillas (new recipe)

Saturday: Dine Out or leftovers

Sunday: Honey Chipotle Glazed Ribs (new recipe), Baked Potatoes, Sauteed Greens (new recipe)

Baking: Planning to get started baking cookies for my Christmas Cookie Boxes….as soon as I figure out which recipes I’m using!

For more menu planning inspiration, check out Menu Plan Monday at I’m an Organizing Junkie.